November 23, 2015 "It's Howdy Doody Time"

Buffalo Bob:  "Say, kids, what time is it?
Kids:  "It's Howdy Doody Time"

It's Howdy Doody time
It's Howdy Doody time
Bob Smith and Howdy Doo
Say Howdy Doo to you.
Let's give a rousing cheer
Cause Howdy Doody's here.
It's time to start the show
So kids let's go.

Dr. S. looks truly upset as he tells me that I have a large mass in my abdomen and a lump in my left breast.
I am stunned.  He gives me a hug.

I go home to settle my affairs.

The next day is Thanksgiving and I look around the table at my much loved children and grandchildren and wonder if I will see another Thanksgiving.

On Black Friday I buy all the Christmas presents, put them in separate large cheerful Santa Claus bags for each family in case they have to pick them up because I am going to be in the hospital.  Maybe they can have Christmas dinner in the cafeteria when they visit me, I think.  I take nine boxes of books to the Goodwill. For some reason, I feel a temporary rush of happiness and exhileration. I am singing the Howdy Doody song in my head.

My father bought our first TV when I was in elementary school. We watched Kukla, Fran and Ollie and the Howdy Doody Show.  There was a transitional screen on Howdy Doody, round like a kalidoscope which would spin around and around.  One night I dreamed of that spinning screen and awakened, knowing what the meaning of it was: I was dead.  I jumped out of my bed and ran to my sleeping parents, announcing that I was dead.

"No, you are not dead" my startled mother said feeling my forehead, "You are burning up with fever".
My father called Dr. Bundy and he came in the middle of the night and gave me a shot of penicillin. I slept peacefully under my soft quilt.

I have three more hikes to go and I will have hiked each of the forty-seven states parks.  I wonder if I can do it.